Late Discovery Adoptees: A Panel Discussion

Kathleen Shea Kirstein is a Late Discovery Adoptee and NPE (Non-Expected Parent Event). She is the mother of two sons, a retired Registered Nurse, and an illustrator of three children’s books with author D. Ann Hollon. She has two essays published in Severance Magazine: Dear Mother and Blown off Course. A third essay called Passport has been published in Anne Heffron’s book To Be Real with several other adoptee writers. 

Ron Morgan discovered that he was adopted in 1991 at the age of 31. In 1995, he invented the term Late Discovery Adoptee to describe adoptees who learn about their adoptive status as adults. In 1997 he created a Yahoo email listserv for LDAs and their supporters. He also served on the Executive Committee of Bastard Nation, the adoptee rights group, from 1997 – 2001. From 2013 – 2019, he participated as an author of a study on impacts of late discovery on adoptees, which was published in the Journal of Family Issues, Volume 40, 2019.

My life took an unexpected turn at 34.  I had always identified as bi-racial, but a DNA test for fun revealed a surprising truth: I was 100% Indian. This explained a lot – hidden aspects of my past, certain experiences, and a lingering feeling of being different. The biggest shock, however, was learning I was adopted. This secret, kept for my entire life, shattered my sense of identity.  It triggered a wave of grief and anger as I grappled with this unexpected deception.

Now, I’m on a journey of self-discovery.  Fueled by a desire for truth, I’m seeking to reconnect with my roots and rebuild myself on a foundation of honesty.